My mouse is sub-prime

Normally, a mouse is just a mouse, but for FPS PC gaming, a mouse is like your trusty rifle. Its your steed, your wheels, your partner, your companion, its IMPORTANT.
I always game with one of these. I think they are the best mice ever made. All other mice feel like a weird shaped clunky piece of crap that looked just LUVERLY on the screen of the imac-wielding buffoon who knocked up the design straight out of art college, but does not actually fit nicely in your hand.
Saddles are that shape because your buttocks fit in them. And so it is with mice.

However...
My problem is that my mouse has been sluggish to respond with right mouse clicks. The 'clickiness' of that vital button is sub-par. So I have spent the last day or so carefully unscrewing it, cleaning it, screwing it back together and experimenting.
I just can't get both left and right mouse buttons to be as clicky as I like. I need instant responsiveness dammit. I've found that by experimenting with the amount that I screw in the top two screws, I can tweak it, but it's still not perfect goddamit.
If you managed to hit me in a COD4 game lately, this is why. Either that or you were sniping me when the man from BA was on the phone pretending they were going to deliver my luggage.

Off to Birmingham tonight to get drunk with game developers. yay!